


To: Hoonie/From: Your Secret Admirer | December 31, 2018

by CK_4267



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: 2park, Angst, Bottom!Jihoon, Sadness, Top!Woojin, chamwink, i cant believe wanna one is disbanding in december, im shedding tears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-04-17
Packaged: 2019-04-13 20:09:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 4,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14119854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CK_4267/pseuds/CK_4267
Summary: Ever since their debut, Woojin leaves letters for Jihoon every month.Jihoon knows that it is one of his members, but for a whole entire year, he can’t tell who it’s from. Every single time, the narrator of the letter seems to change perspective.The last letter is on the last day of 2018, in December. Precisely, the day they disband.Or the 2park letter!au that no one wanted or asked for. Stay tuned for 17 days, 17 letters!





	1. How the letters started

**Author's Note:**

> Hey yall, i was inspired to write this by watching my most favorite but saddest 2park edit in the world. Here’s the link:
> 
> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gqr-BT-iCJA
> 
> Go shower the editor with some love!

It started on the day of their debut: August 7, 2017. It was a Monday, and Jihoon woke up with an immediate smile on his face. He was excited for Wanna One’s debut. But first things first, find his glasses. Let’s just say that he didn’t exactly have 20-20 vision. As he fumbled around for his glasses, his hand touched paper. Mystified he got a grab of his glasses, slammed them onto his face, and found the paper.

He was surprised when he saw it was envelope. On the front it read:

To: My Hoonie :)

From: Your Secret Admirer

Thinking it was a joke, he opened it and pulled out a blue sheet of paper that was filled with cute, bubbly handwriting. 

_Dear Jihoon,_

_You’re finally debuting! Oh my gosh! I’m so happy for you. You honestly don’t know how much I love you. I wish I could be there with you for your comeback, but I bet you would be pretty confused. Just remember, you are the light that shines when I’m lost._

_Love, Your Secret Admirer_

“Alright who did this? Fess up now before I punish you real bad!” Jihoon exclaimed as he marched into their living room filled with the other 10 members. The all looked at him with confusion, not knowing what he was talking about. Jihoon couldn’t figure out this person’s handwriting or their style of speech. None of the members were this straight forward. 

When he saw that none of the members knew what he was talking about he uttered out a loud, “Ugh!” and stomped to his and Woojin’s shared bathroom to get ready for the upcoming, busy day. As soon as he left, nine heads turned to Woojin. He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. Really, it was hard for him to pretend he didn’t know what Jihoon was talking. He had told his other members about his crush on Jihoon and how he was going to leave a letter for him every month. 

The members found it cute, but they didn’t realize how hard it was to keep his little secret. Luckily, they were all good actors. 

At the last Monday of each month, Jihoon would wake up to find a letter next to his head. At first, he found it creepy and thought it was a sasaeng fan. But the other members would always tell him that it wasn’t a stalker. But, little by little, Jihoon got used to it and even wanted the letter to come quicker so he wouldn’t have to wait each month.

Jihoon found it rather sweet that this person cared so much for him. And lets face it, who wouldn’t develop a crush on your secret admirer would who send lenters that drip with sweet words? It became a regular routine. Every time, Jihoon would walk out into the living room to find all his members already there. He would read his letter to them, and every single time, they would scream and cringe at the words.

Jihoon already knew that it was one of his members that would write him a letter. Who else would be able to sneak a letter into his bed? And yes, Jihoon tried to check the security cameras, but they were always turned off on that specific night. The admirer was smart because he made sure to turn off all the security cameras in the dorm so Jihoon couldn’t check for a missing member in any of the other rooms. 

At exactly 2 AM, the cameras would turn off, and exactly at 4 AM, the cameras would turn back on. 

The reason why figuring out the admirer was so hard, was because each letter would be in someone else’s perspective. For example, one letter would have words and phrases that only Lai Guanlin would say. Or a letter could have the proper and polite tone of Hwang Minhyun. Each month, it would sound like someone new. 

And all the members knew about this switch. So, everytime Jihoon finished reading a letter, the member who it sounded like would raise his hand and say, “Hey it’s me!” Of course, this was only a joke and no member would actually confess.

At the start of the 2017, Jihoon’s resolution was to figure out who this mystery writer was. Jihoon started off by getting rid of the members who were already in a relationship. the following list is what Jihoon’s looked like:

  * ~~Jinyoung~~
  * ~~Daehwi~~
  * ~~Seongwu~~
  * ~~daniel~~
  * ~~Sungwoon~~
  * ~~~~~~~~Jisung
  * ~~Guanlin~~
  * ~~~~Woojin
  * ~~Jaehwan~~
  * ~~Minhyun~~



 This left Jisung hyung and Woojin, but neither of them showed romantic effection towards Jihoon what so ever. Jisung treated Jihoon like his own son, and Woojin treated him like. Well. A friend. 

It frustrated Jihoon to an extent that he started to stay up late and sleep later just to catch this person. Of course, it never worked. He always feel asleep early no matter how hard he tried.

During the time Wanna One was together, Jihoon started to develop feelings for Woojin. He never confessed, therefore, Woojin never knew. At one point, Jihoon almost guessed Woojin was the writer because Jihoon asked him how many fonts he could write. Woojin completely forgot about the letter-writing, and used the letter font for one of his many ways of writing. Jihoon pointed it out, but luckily, Minhyun hyung saved the day by making Jihoon help him wash the dishes. 

For Jihoon, it was a one-sided love with Woojin. He expressed his growing feelings by small little signs of effection such as hugs, holding hands, and sometimes an occasional kiss on the cheek (which Woojin loved, thank you very much), nothing more. Woojin would hug him back and hold his hand, but it just didn’t have the romantic feeling. 

Many days Jihoon would find himself trying to decide who he loved more; the letter-writer or Woojin. Of course, he didn’t even know that they were the same person. 

Sooner than Wanna One knew, their day of disbandment had arrived. They had recently had their last concert where they had all shed tears :(. They tried to talk and interact as much as they could. Every night, each one would secretly shed tears into their pillows, wishing that this miracle called Wanna One would never end. 

Their last day together was on, in fact, the last Monday of December. The last day of the year. And in this letter, the writer confessed who he was. Immediately after reading the letter, Jihoon ran out into the living room, but today was different. Instead, the members weren’t gathered up. They had all already left and it was only Jihoon left in their dorm. Feeling his heart break into pieces, he gathered his stuff up, called his manager, and left their dorm, locking it on his way out. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ubrhclgenriulru this ending tho. The next chapters will be the letters left for Jihoon. Each chapter will be one letter. Of course, the very last chapter might be what happens after Wanna One disbanded, who knows ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


	2. Letter One: No One’s Perspective (August)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unknown letter arrives

Dear Jihoon,

You’re finally debuting! Oh my gosh! I’m so happy for you. You honestly don’t know how much I love you. I wish I could be there with you for your comeback, but I bet you would be pretty confused. Just remember, you are the light that shines when I’m lost.

Love, Your Secret Admirer


	3. Letter Two: Woojin’s Persepctive (September)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The second letter arrives, and Jihoon suspects that it is woojin as it sounds like him.

Dear Angry Jigglypuff, 

Yo, Jihoon! It’s been a month since your letter came in. Just a heads up, every last Monday of the month, you will receive a letter. And don’t worry, there’s a reason behind it all :). But, your reaction when you first read the letter was priceless. Honestly, this is why I love you. You can be so angry and irritated, but to me, it’s absolutely adorable. I know you’ve been practicing espicially hard since you’re debut. But please, my Hoonie, don’t push yourself too hard. It hurts to see you too tired. I bet it hurts the fans’ hearts too. This is where I will be ending the letter. I love you, angry Jigglypuff!

Love, 

Your secret Admirer <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, it’s your author-nim here. I will update a letter every single day, which means if you want to to read all of them, please be up to date for 17 days as there will be 17 letters (Wanna One is together for 17 months, you can check). 
> 
> Some times I will miss a day, because who doesn’t when exams are coming up in school? Please just bare with me if that’s happens! 
> 
> Thank you! -CK_4267


	4. Letter Three: Guanlin’s Perspective (October)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The third letter leaves Jihoon perplexed as it now sounds like Guanlin.

My Hoonie, 

It’s been really hard, not writing to you. I’ve only written you two letters (this is the third) and yet, i feel like I’ve written you a thousand. I’ve never written so well and thoroughly (in Korean?) before. But its nice, getting my feelings out to a certain somebody ;). 

October has been crazy for you hasn’t it? You had a ton of fan signs/meetings and then you and the rest of Wanna One had to attend KCON! I screamed just like the other fans when you (and Wanna One) came out in the Seoul Awards. And let’s not forget when I listened to your phone interview, because who wouldn’t? Did you know that I attended every single fan sign and fan meeting just to see your smiling face? I learn so much about you every day and it makes me happy. 

This is where I will be ending this letter. I love you, Hoonie!

Love, Your Secret Admirer ;)


	5. Letter Four: Jinyoung’s Perspective (November)

Dear Jihoon,

Ah, my winkboy! Happy Thanksgiving!

It’s funny isn’t it? It’s only been the maknae line writing to you! Don’t worry, I’ll make it sound like the hyungs and that will confuse you even more ;). Confused Jihoon is cute Jihoon. Well, every aspect of Jihoon is cute Jihoon to me. *insert cool-posing admirer*. I want you to know who I am so badly. And I know that you want to know also! But, I need to be more patient. Maybe I’ll confess sooner than I expected. 

But, Jihoon! Please don’t tire yourself out! I know I say this in every single letter, but I’m being serious. I hate to see my Hoonie tired. Hmm... maybe my good looks can make you feel better. Just kidding, you will always be the most handsome in my eyes, no matter how handsome I might be. 

This is where I will be ending my letter now. I love you!

Love, Your Secret Admirer 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahjklf hsKEFLWSGKFHD I’m sorry for missing yesterday's update!


	6. Letter Five: Daniel’s Perspective (December)

Dear Jihoooooooniieee,

JIHOONNNIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!! IT’S ME AGAIIIIINNN!!!!! I’VE WANTED TO CUDDLE WITH YOU SO BAAAADD!!! 

I know and you know that you were antsy for the letter. I hear you, you know. You’re always saying, “I want the letter~” or “Hurry upppp~”. But, it’s cute. I saw that you have looked more rested and well-fed. Is this because I have encouraged (*ahem* forced *ahem*) you to do so in the letters? I hope so!

Just looking at you makes me want to smile my unique smile at you. Agvhueubliulaiuylruygt I SAW YOU AT MAMAs AND MELON MUSIC AWARDS! aaaahhh!!!! You (and the rest of Wanna One) looked so frickin handsome kill me already. And ahaha I‘ve watched Wanna One Go season 2 and it’s honestly hilarious. Let’s not forget how you got hit in the balls by Woojin and in the face by Woojin! I almost died of laughter when that happened. 

This is where I will be ending my letter now. Like always, rest well and eat well. Oh! And before I forget, Merry Christmas! I love you Jihoonie!

Love, Your Secret Admirer 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys~  
> Sorry for updating this story so late into that night. I had school :(. Then, right after, I had gymnastics for 3 hours. After I came home, my ipad (which i write on) was still in my school bag, which was left in my mom’s car when I went to gymnastics. Sadly, my mom wasn’t home so I had to wait for 30 minutes. But when I thought I would be able to write, my mom forced me to do my homework which lasted about 45 minutes. So yeah. That’s my life. Ok, gotta blast!  
> -CK_4267


	7. Letter Six: Jisung’s Perspective (January)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol I was writing this during school. We were supposed to be doing a green screen project, but I was already finished (it was about BTS). My teacher didn’t tell me what to do so I just guessed that I could do whatever on my ipad. I decided to update on the letters just in case I can’t do it later :).

Dear My Baby, 

My little baby, happy New Years! Wow! It’s weird to think that it has been five months since the letters started. It just shows how fast Wanna One is going :(.

You know, it makes my heart jump that you’re finally starting to accept my letters! I have never seen you so impatient! Always complaining. Tsk tsk, so annoying. But, its ok, I still love my little baby.

I’m excited for this new year! I can’t wait to see your amazing accomplishments. 2017 was good but 2018 will be better! 

...

ok, ok, I’ll stop with the cringey lines. But only one month into 2018, you and the rest of Wanna One are already going to fansigns, fanmeetings, and awards! And like, all of my sentences are ending with exclamation marks!

! ! ! !

sorry, now I’m just getting off topic because I don’t know what to say.

...awkward...

sooooo.... this is where I will be ending my letter. DON’T FORGET TO EAT AND REST WELL! I love you my little baby!

love, your (awkward but motherly) secret admirer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was listening to this amazing mashup while writing this. This musical genius created a song with Monsta X’s “Dramarama” and Wanna One’s “Boomerang”. I’ll attach the link so you guys can shower the genius with love. Now, gotta blast! 
> 
> Mashup link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7R1GSYjGYY&app=desktop


	8. Chapter Seven: Seongwoo’s Perspective (February)

Dear Raging Jigglypuff, 

Heeeeeeeyy it’s meeeeee!!!!!!!!

I’M BACK! So babe, how was it, waiting a whole month for my letter? Excruciating right? You wanted to feel my ABSOLUTELY amazing presence, right? RIGHT? No? Oh, ok.

HAPPY GRADUATION!! Yayayayayay by Hoonie has graduated!!! I was absolutely ecstatic and let’s not forget the adorable 2Park live you and Woojin did. Please tell him that your secret admirer says congratulations.

Right now, I’m in dance practice writing this. I’m a dancer too! Except, I’m not as well-known as you. And don’t THINK I would tell you if I was a trainee or if I already debuted. That would give too much away. But, did you know that I left dance class, pretending to go use the bathroom so I could write my letter to you? It’s all for you, babe!

I saw you guys on the ISACs by the way. I was rooting and screaming for you (probably the loudest) from my seat. I hope I embarrassed you :). It’s fun to see you flustered. 

I also saw you on I Can See Your Voice and booooiii that beat-boxing was straight on!

Oh poop. My hyung is calling for me to do the laundry. Well, this is where my letter will be ending. Happy Valentines Day and I love you!

Love, Your Troll

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow. Just wow. I wonder what’s wrong with me. I missed the update yesterday. AND BECAUSE I DID, I WILL DOUBLE UPDATE TODAY! The double update will be later in the day tho.


	9. Letter Eight: Daehwi’s Perspective (March)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m writing this in 3rd period (literacy) because we have sub who’s letting us do whatever we want. How nice.

Dear Jihoonie,

Hi bae  ~~jinyoung~~ ~~~~! How are you? I’m hope you’re doing good. Although I see you everyday, you might be hiding a depressed Jihoon behind a happy facade. If you’re every upset, remember, you can always leave me a letter :).

I don’t think that this letter will be very long. I’m not that good at expressing myself anyway. Aren’t you ever tired? Because you’re “running” through my mind everyday. 

...sorry

I’m not the best at pick-up lines. It’s always other people who are using pick-up lines on me. I’m a bottom, not a top... so... that took an awkward turn... 

I’m very happy that you got to rest a little more this month. How is it to finally be graduated? Must feel nice, huh? Lol, I saw that your Wikipedia page was deleted then put back again. I don’t know why I keep on laughing at that. 

This is where I’ll be ending my letter now. Eat and rest well! I love you!

Love, Bae <3


	10. Letter Nine: Minhyun’s Perspective (April)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lmao remember how I was supposed to do a double update yesterday? WELL THIS AUTHOR IS A HELLA DUMB TROLL AND FORGOT TO DO IT! Therefore, this chapter I’m posting right now is taking the place of today’s update while the chapter nine will take the place of yesterday’s double update.

Dear Jihoon,

Hello Jihoon, how are you? I hope that you have been doing alright this past month! 

I’ve been doing great, and the majority is because I get to see your smile everyday :). 

I like to see that your schedule is planned out so you can wisely time when you get your beauty sleep. Little Jihoon must not get little sleep! And don’t forget to ALWAYS KEEP CLEAN! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

I’ve been looking at you closely these days, and you look more depressed. I’m always here for you Little Jihoon. If you need me, I’m only a letter away. 

This is where my letter will be ending. Eat and rest well. Love you!

Love, your mom 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hqincurcirtuhg i just realized that i’m oh so kind and leave kudos and nice comments on my sister’s stories, and yet, she calls my stories crappy. Like EXCUSE ME?!


	11. Letter Ten: No one’s Perspective (May)

Dear Jihoon, 

Hi! I wish I could write a longer note for you, but right now, I’m not in the best situation. I feel like my mind keeps on constantly blanking, and I don’t know what to do. I hate complaining to you because I don’t deserve you. I’m not worthy enough for you. 

You shouldn’t have to hear my troubles, it just makes everything harder on you and on me.   
I constantly feel like I’m not loved and that well, I don’t know where I’m going. As Wanna One’s time together is slowly coming to an end, I start to worry. What will I do when all of this is over? What will happen to my love for you? 

I could say more, but this is where I will be ending my letter. I’m sorry.

Your Secret Admirer 


	12. Letter Eleven: Sungwoon’s Perspective (June)

Dear Pig, 

Hi pig, it’s your admirer (hyung!). I really appreciated that although it was short and a little cringy (But sweet), you left me a little letter, asking me if I was ok. It really made my day! I want you to know that I am fine now and completely happy! I think it was just a small phase I went through. 

Now that it seems you will continue to write to me, feel free to ask me questions, but not too specific ones. It just spoils the fun of a secret admirer if you know who I am.

It’s finally summer! I can’t wait to see your tanned and muscled buddy ;). Just kidding, that’s just dirty. 

I hope to see you relax at the beach and have the vacation you need. 

This is where I will be ending my letter now. Eat and rest well. I love you, you little pig!

Love, 

Your Hyung 


	13. Letter Twelve: Jaehwan’s Perspective (July)

Jihoonie!!

hihihihihihi *insert maniac laugh*

I’m only like this because YOU ACTUALLY LEFT ME A LETTER YOU SWEET BOY! YOu asked me a few questions, so I will try my best to answer them.

1.) How old are you?: That’s a little specific isn’t it? It might give away some things. The only thing I will tell you is that my birth year is very close to your's.

2.) Do you dance?: yes! I do! You pay attention don’t you?

3.) If you do dance, what type of dance do you do?: I do... almost all of them! Popping, hip-hop, krumping. But, I mostly prefer to do popping.

4.) Are you a trainee?: I can not tell you.

5.) Do you have a nickname? If so, what is it?: Getting sneaky, aren't you? Well, I do have a nickname, but I can not tell you. I'll give you a hint though, it starts with ㅊ. 

Well, thats it for the questions! Feel free to ask more! 

This is where I will be ending my letter. Remember to enjoy the summer when its at its finest peak. Don’t forget to eat and rest well. I love you!

Love, Your Secret Admirer 


	14. Letter Thirteen: Woojin’s Perspective (August)

Dear Raging Jigglypuff,  

Woohoo! We have finished all of the members and are back to square one. But wow, its been going so fast. It’s already August... WAIT! It has already been a year! NOOOOOOOO time is going so quickly :(

But even after Wanna One’s disbandment, I’ll find a way to keep on sending you notes. 

Ok, aside from all the mushy sad stuff; the questions!

1.) Where do you dance?: Hm... I’m debating if I should tell you! Ok, I will. So, I’m a trainee at CJ E&M, thats why I can send you letters. But, don’t try to look for me. I don’t stand out much 

2.) Do you know the Pink Sausage Duo?: BUNSSODAN CROSS FOR LIFE!!! So, yes! Even though I am in love with you, I ship you guys so much!

3.) Do you like Panwink?: please don't be offended, but a BIG. FAT. NO. I hATe Panwink. I only ship you with Woojin. And isn’t Guanlin already dating Yoo Seonho?

4.) Ongniel is...?: SCIENCE! EASY! Are you now just testing my skills on Wanna One ships? Well GUESS WHAT? I gOt SoMe SkilLz tOo!

End of questions? Yep! 

Ugh, I hate ending the letter like “this is where I will be ending the letter now”. But since I started it, I need to end it like this.

this is where I will be ending the letter. Eat and rest well! I love you!

Love, Your Secret Admirer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi y’all. So, why didn’t I update yesterday? And the day before that? Hm? HM? well, so you see, i’m still a middle schooler. In the USA, every state takes a state test for elementary and middle schoolers. For Pennsylvania, they are called the PSSAs which have been going since Tuesday, hence no update!  
> The testing makes me super stressed :(  
> The testing will proceed until next wednesday.  
> So please don’t be surprised if I miss an update! Thanks!


	15. Letter Fourteen: Jinyoung’s Perspective (September)

Dear Jihoonie, 

Hihi! You didn’t leave me a letter this time, it made me sad :(

But, I understand. You and the rest of Wanna One have been super busy, preparing for the last world tour before you guys disband ( **a/n this is completely made up. After June, there is no set schedule for Wanna One. Actually, there is a world tour in June so... I kinda messed that up. I just checked today, hehe. Don’t mind that.).**

You’re always crying now, tsk tsk such a crybaby. But remember, i’m Always here if you want to talk. 

I know you probably won’t care about my day, but I’ll still tell you. Today I went to school and right after I went to dance practice, and guess what! I was dancing to Wanna One Energetic. After dance practice, I went to the cafe with my friends and obviously talked to them about you. They know about my obsession with you.

When I got home, I finished my homework and now I’m writing this letter. How do I get it to you? I have a friend who’s in Wanna One, and I give my letter to him. He then puts it on your bed. 

Oh wait. My hyung is making me sign a few albums, gotta blast!

Remember to eat and rest well. Love you!

Love, Your Secret Admirer

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> today is the wanna one go in jeju. Super random i was just looking at wanna one’s schedule and saw that.


	16. Letter Fifteen: Daehwi’s Perspective (October)

Dear Hoonie, 

Jihoon, do you know what happened today? One of my friends tried to set me up on a blind date. And you know what I did? I turned him down FLAT! He told me that I didn’t even have a chance with you so I should just move on. 

I told him that I didn’t care if I had a chance with you, I would always love you even if you didn’t love me. 

But, should I just give up? I was really hoping that I could make it to the end, I could make it until you guys disbanded, then i would tell you who I am.   
It seems that even if you knew me, you wouldn’t love me. I can tell, you already love Guanlin. Turns out maybe one side of panwink might come true. 

I only need to write two more letters until this all ends. Or, I could end it here. I don’t know if I have the strength to move on.

love you

Your Secret Admirer


	17. Letter Sixteen: Daniel’s perspective (November)

Dear Jigglypuff, 

Hihi! The letters are coming to an end, aren’t they? 

It was so much fun writing to you! Thank you for accepting me, even though I might’ve seemed a bit creepy at first. We only have one more month together, but I made so many good memories of and with you during the 17 months we were together. You might not have noticed, but you almost caught me so many times and I also left many subtle clues.

I remember when one day I was practicing for a showcase when you accidentally walked in. You told me tant I was really good and that I should keep up the good work. It made me feel really good. 

I don’t know how you might react when I tell you who I am. You might be happy or mad. 

But, just remember, I love you!

Love, Your Secret Admirer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is coming to an end :(  
> Only one more letter and epilogue left to go


	18. Chapter Seventeen: The Last Letter

Dear Jihoon, 

so, hey. It’s... December 31, 2018. The day we... disband. Currently, it is 2 AM and I’m down in the kitchen writing this. I am also shedding silent tears, knowing that in just a few hours, I will be leaving this cozy dorm forever. Leaving my Wanna One family. 

If you haven’t guessed already, I’m a Wanna One member. Ever since Produce 101, I had a major crush on you, and when I made it in to the group, I felt like I was on cloud 9. But then, it was Panwink this and Panwink that! There was no more 2park, or Chamwink anymore. 

So there you have it. Your secret admirer this whole time has been me, Woojin. I don’t really know how you’re going to react to being me, but I really enjoyed being your friend for this whole time. Even though I never got to confess you, our bond was strong and I don’t regret it at all.

Thank you for being there when I needed to cry on someone’s shoulder and when I was weak and not able to move on. You were there to push me through the hardest times. 

I hope that I was able to be there for you too. I treasure those times when you and I would stay up late watching animes, dramas and fanboying over BTS. Those times when you and I would dance together, just us. 

I don’t know why I started this chain of letters, but I’m glad I did. I was able to communicate with you by a different identity. I’m sorry for keeping myself concealed, its just that you like Guanlin and you would reject me. 

I kinda regret I didn’t tell you before, but now its too late isn’t it? I wish you the happiest times now Wanna One is over. The greatest things will happen, believe me. 

This is where I will be ending this letter now. Eat and rest well. I love you, my love Hoonie. Good bye.

Love, Woojinie <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember April 16, 2014.
> 
> I was in second grade then. 
> 
> I pray for those who still stuffer.


	19. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened after Wanna One disbanded?

After one year of Wanna One disbanding, others had started their own activities. Minhyun had returned to Nu’est and Sungwoon had retuned to HOTSHOT. Jinyoung had left C9 Entertainment, joining Brand New Music to be with Daehwi. When this news came out, people approved and disapproved. It was a hard time for both, but they still got through it. And the end result was so worth it. The two debuted as a duo, also as the first gay kpop idol couple. 

Kang Daniel debuted in a group that consisted of him, Jisung, Guanlin, Seonho, and Seongwu. Jaehwan became a soloist, but did many collabs with Sewoon. I wonder why. 

Jihoon decided to leave dancing and singing and focus on acting again. Woojin was the only one in Wanna One who didn’t debut again. He stayed as a trainee instead, learning more on music composition. Many times he would catch himself yearning for Jihoon’s company.

Woojin would spend his days cooped up in his studio, producing music for the new rookie idols under Brand New Music. Sometimes he would dance and rap for fun, but when he did he was reminded of the feeling of being part of Wanna One. 

He would watch the dramas Jihoon was part of, fanboying to Daehwi and Jinyoung. 

“Hyung, just confess already.” 

“Um, no. He doesn’t like me, I know.” 

Woojin would constantly have this conversation with with the Jinhwi couple. He had no way of contacting him whatsoever and even if he did, he would be too scared to. Or so he thought. 

One day while Woojin was practicing some popping for an upcoming showcase for new trainees, Youngmin popped his head into the studio, holding a few papers. “Woojinie! Mail!”

”Ok hyung, just drop it next to the speaker.” Woojin was so focused on his routine that he he missed the mischievous glint in Youngmin’s eyes. What awaited Woojin next was going to be hilarious. 

Woojin finally decided to take a break. He grabbed his water bottle, plopping down next to his pile of mail. “Ok, manager, bills, letter from Yerim, to Chamsae, more mana- to Chamsae?” A letter caught his eye, labeled “To Chamsae”. 

“Heh, I bet this is like fan mail or something. Oh well, I like to read these anyway.” He tore the envelope open and pulled out a neatly folded letter. All of a sudden, his heart started to thud in his chest. He didn’t know why, but he felt like someone important had written to him. Someone like... Jihoon. 

_Dear my 사랑 (love) Chamsae,_

_Hey! It’s been a hella long time since we last contacted each other huh? But you’re such a mean person. How dare you just... LEAVE without staying to at least say goodbye? You don’t know how heart-broken I was. I was just about to go out and confess my feelings but you were already gone.  
_

_You know, I’ve liked you for a long time. I think it was around December that I realized I liked you. I was torn. I didn’t know who I should like more, my secret admirer or you. Funny thing is, both were you any who!_

_I listen to your music everyday, yearning to hear your voice in it. You should really start rapping and dancing again! I haven’t seen how you’ve changed since we disbanded. It’s not fair, you get to see how I look like but I don’t >:(_

_I want to see you again soon._

_This is where I will be ending this letter. Eat and rest well. Love you, miss you!_

_Love, Your 사랑 (love) Hoonie_

After reading the letter, a tear slid down his cheek, catching him by surprise. He wiped it away, but it was quickly replaced by another. Soon, he was sobbing silently. But as soon as the door opened, he shut his mouth and held in his sobs. Frantically wiping his eyes, he hid the letter. 

But his poor attempts at hiding the fact that he was crying, failed. Because when the person came in said “Woojin?” with an all too familiar voice and tone, Woojin burst out crying again. 

“Woojinie! Why are you crying?” Jihoon exclaimed running over and embracing him tightly. Jihoon laughed and said, “Was it becasue of my letter?” 

“Shut up,” Woojin responded wetly, sobs dimmed down to soft sniffles. “I missed you Hoonie.” 

Jihoon got tears in his eyes as well and blinked them away as he said, “Me too Chamsae, me too. And you know what? I love you a hella lot too.”

Woojin pulled away and lightly pressed a kiss against Jihoon’s forehead. “I love you a hella lot too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAYAYAY i finally FINALLY finished “To: Hoonie/From: Your Secret Admirer | December 31, 2018” or something like that. I always forget the title to this story.   
> So yes, I suck at writing. Therfore, I am pretty sure that half my eaders had no clue what was going on. So basically, at the last monday of every month, Woojin would get a member to write a letter while he told them what to write. This way, Jihoon would never be able to guess who was the secret admirer as it switched every month. 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed this little story about Woojin’s letter to Jihoon. I will be putting my entire focus on “Stray Kids-The Last 10” so please be ready for an upcoming update there. 
> 
> Now, author’s gotta blast!


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